Killing that Damn :< Bug

Killing a bug may be nothing to most people, but to me - I am killing a living thing that is capable of thinking. No thinking as all humans do, but just thinking; with due sense of having a brain. They have the ability to feel pain, like humans do. They have a need to survive, as most humans do.

So earlier today, I was helping my dad with chores outside in the garden. During one of the more menial jobs (relocating garden tiles, yes those heavy cement blocks that sit in your garden so you can use them as stepping stones), a black ant bit my dad's palm. (It should be honorable to mention that he was bitten twice by two different black ants). As he was well versed in the "arts" of being stung (he was stung by various insects before), he uttered that the bite was comparable to the sting of a honeybee. That said, he ordered me to fetch the "neccesary equipments" so that he can sentence the whole colony to death. You could imagine the look on my face. 

Courtesy of Chiirin | Anime-

www.anime-planet.com

I am that kind of person that will use the power of the kaze 風 (wind) generated from my kuchi 口(mouth) : 風口 or 吹き (blowing winds) to blow a mosquito away when she drinks her fill of my blood instead of smacking it into oblivion, the type that will say sorry to insects that he accidentally steps on - and sentencing a colony to death because of the wrong of a single (or two) worker?

Well some might argue that it is the instincts of the colony to protect the hive, because it is an order by pheromone of the queen. Isn't that more of a reason that these bugs are innocent? If these bugs appear to be humans, you dont see higher ups sentencing a whole village to death because the occupants want to protect their own territory (or maybe they do, but that's in the past).  

Anyways I was thinking that maybe there was no other methods, so I brought the killing machine (Ridsect) and my dad performed the purging of the colony. As much as I try to be a kind person that don't kill uneccesarily, I was reminded again and again by the devil sitting on my right shoulder that I would be a hypocrite, then. I am not a strict herbivore or a vegan. 

My dad reasoned that if the colony was not purged - and instead let to grow; then it would be disastrous for us when we will do even more menial jobs in the future.

Sounds pretty legit, but I couldnt help feeling that I have shed off some humanity. 

After all, there is no right or wrong answer in a universe where reasonings are undefined.

Ryūgajō Nanana no Maizōkin (龍ヶ嬢七々々の埋蔵金)

I stumbled across this anime a few months ago, watched it since episode 1 and still watching. 

I have watched LOTS of anime, and well - a guy moves into an apartment and rent is cheap. Turns out, it was because there was a female earthbound spirit living in the sitting room of the apartment room he rented. (She was murdered and cannot pass on until she finds out who killed her.)

(Credits to RandomMc.net)

She is a HUGE glutton when it comes to pudding, but she does not get fat (Not sure if its because she's already dead or because its an anime :| ). Yes, she can physically touch things, but cannot escape the room because shes earthbound (more like roombound).

Turns out, she is Nanana, a girl that saved the island by going on an adventure and obtained lots of treasures with magical powers. Prior to her murder, she hid the treasures by scattering them around different troves. Each trove has their own traps that require not only the skills and wits; but also great intelligence. These treasures are then known as the buried treasures of Ryugajou Nanana. She is now encouraging everyone to look for the treasures for their own satisfaction, but normal people usually are not able to gain and obtain them for their own benefit due to each trove containing numerous number of dangerous life threatening threats.

However, in one school on the island - there exists an Adventure Club dedicated just to locate and obtain the treasures. With two new members: A strong-willed idiot and a genius (yeah, her name literally translates to "Genius"), the members of the club now has a better chance to obtain these treasures? 

(Credits to RandomMc.net)

This anime is indeed one that grows on you with time :)

WAIT, DID I MENTION THAT THERE IS A CROSSDRESSING MAID?

Blah. Anyways..

ONWARD, to find the next buried treasure!

Most Embarassing Thing EVA

Well, just bought a new phone this new year. Like all dream phones, theres a front camera so I ended up doing what most people do with phones with front cameras. Selfies. And more selfies. But I selfie-d less. I didnt take a picture of my grace like everywhere and anywhere at any time. Just when I felt like it I would take out my phone, go to the camera and SNAP. And theres my face waiting to be posted on yours sincerely FACEBOOK. But NO. As much as I would love to share a selfie (with my face of course, not my p*nis.) with everyone on FACEBOOK, I am not an attention seeker so I would rather keep my selfies to myself and laugh at them when I am feeling down or what.

But with a good phone comes great responsibilities. For example, imagine a time when your groupmates need to take a picture of an experimental result they just found. Yeah engineers have to take pictures to include in reports ALL the time. And the thing is that they dont have super good phones with them and even if they did take a picture it would come out blur and looking like censored pornography. So its okay. Take a picture. SNAP.

And then your brain goes "lets show it to them to see if they're satisfied with the shot".

And you show them the pictures one by one. Next.


Next.



Next.



AND LO AND BEHOLD ITS RIGHT THERE THE SELFIE YOU TOOK LAST NIGHT

And they pretend to look somewhere else and you're like oh .I .No .I .mean. what.

Though I imagine its not as awkward as when you take a naked shot of yourself. Thankfully I dont do kinky stuff.

Anyways blah.

Might as well share it somewhere no one reads and hope I will be famous in death.

Oh yes I am a ninja.

Serenity Again

So I was cleaning up my files when I had the time, and one corner of the computer screen caught my eye. It was NOVELTY, a Visual Novel maker. I remembered a novel I wrote and voiced over, Serenity and I clicked to play it. How long has it been already, two years?

I was a little sceptical about the game I created myself, I don't even remember the choices you need to get to the true ending, so I just CTRL-ed through to find the true ending. At some points though I stopped to listen to the wonderful music, and at some points I felt stupid for writing such an ending. I would gladly use a time machine to slap my past self, lol.

Some of these endings really hit me emotionally, as part of the story was based on my emotions at that time. My needs and wants and what was going on in my life + how I felt. So I decided then, not to delete the file. a 100 Mb, but for keepsake why not?

The download link is probably in one of my old blog posts. It's a 4Shared link, so I dont expect anyone to register just to download it, hah.

Bellflowers and Palamecia Roots

Finishing this year (2013) and also my fourth semester in my Degree, I have to say that it was... Mortifying. Agonizing. Dreadful. MAD, yes. It was totally mad. It drove me up the wall several times, having me feel like a strangled fowl. It doesn't take a genius to see that I have been doing horribly in the finals of the semester. Sure, the semester was good and all - the assignments and project were dreadfully tiring but it was doable. What bothered me was the finals. Yeah, the finals. 

So anyway forgive the randomly allocated post name. It was just something I thought up like three to four seconds before I started typing these long meaningless paragraphs of words.

Year 2013 wasn't the best year I have seen, but certainly it couldn't be the worst I will see. I have caught on news about many people that I know by name - and a number of them has passed on, on this year itself. I have no idea if I only became more aware of things happening around myself recently, or there really seem to be some force at work. I would choose the latter though, I am usually ignorant during the previous span of my life.

I got to meet many interesting people, and also made some enemies out of people. I am sure that with my double-edged sword personality - carefree at times and really dead on serious instantly at another would annoy people and get them to rethink their friendship, but yeah. I have been trying really hard to stick to one, but it is hard because this has sort of become a habitual instinct. I would even like to apologize, but by the time I finish we would all be old enough to crumble at any second.. So I would leave it at that.

I have abandoned a lot of my friends because of my own pride and attitude. First, I want to be the top in class. And then I feel like it would not be bad to be at the bottom. At times I feel lonely, and then I am not. I at times really miss someone. And then I dont. I sometimes make light of my friends and spend my time completing my seemingly endless assignments and projects - even though I really could do them earlier, I procastinate. And then when I am invited out by my friends - I have to reject them.

As I got busier, I suddenly have to help organize a large-scale event in February next year (2014). As it coincided with me needing to find a new scholarship to substain my education and also helping out to move to a new house, I was busier than ever - and also stressed out. It was not the fault of the club's. It was mine and mine alone - and this all stems from my inability to say "NO" and also my incapability of seeing myself happy alone while everyone else around me have to suffer. And this leads to me having to again reject invitations to outings from my friends.

If my friend, in any way gets hold of this post and read them - I want to apologize from the bottom of my heart. I am really sorry. 

Also, I am sorry to make my family worry so much about me. I am this type of person that won't ever forgive himself for mistakes done - and so during exams I would be ripping my hair out stressing myself and secluding myself from the outside world. 

What I want to approach in year 2014 is to be a more carefree person, and spend 50% of my time having fun with my family and friends and strictly 50% on work and education. I hope not to have my work and education taking over my life and making everyone worry about me, and having me worry about myself - I want to learn to love myself and give myself a treat. And with that I have quitted the Debater's Club. I sure won't want to organize any more events and become the President - although it is a good thing - it is just not worth my already limited time. 

I want to learn not to give a fuck about other people's wants except if they are family, or if they are really important. I don't want to be taken for granted, and so I don't want to care. 

I want to be able to confidently say "NO" if I am really unhappy and voice out when I am in disagreement, because I found out that is where my problems stem from.

I want to be a person that is there for my family and friends, and most importantly be there for myself.

Most of all, I want to be a person I can be proud of - not a person others want to be.