Just in Case :O

At work today (internship) I was scavenging through circuit boards to find useful stuff so that my friend can find something to test the Arduino Board out with. While looking at the board, some white stuff stuck to my hand, and I realized that it was from some gluish chemical used to stick wire casings to the insides of inductors. It smelt awful, really chemicalish (is that even a word) and I am very sure it might have been toxic and harmful to humans. However, I can't keep the thought of testing to see if it really is poisonous out of my mind. Like I was really tempted to stick the finger that got hold of the white substance in my mouth and see if I am still okay for the rest of the day - but I did not. Right after that train of thought have passed, I was again visited by another similarly directed thought. Just in case I accidentally took in some of the toxic and got into a horrible state, I might as well take it first so that I won't have to worry so much about getting into this "horrible" state in the future.

This might seem really complicated, so I thought of a few examples (not true) to explain this conflicted feeling.

Example 1

So I needn't worry about getting my leg injured later on, I purposely injure it first so that I can feel the relief of needing to worry.

Example 2

So I needn't worry about accidentally breaking the glass decoration on the fireplace later on, I break it first on purpose.

Example 3

So I needn't worry about the rain dousing the laundry, I wet them with the hose.

Example 4

So I needn't worry about my wallet being stolen or lost, I throw them away first.

And other stuff like that. I know it might seem illogical and even insensible to practice, but some time your brain just feels like fucking around - resulting in one of the many choices to make becoming corrupted and inpractical.

Sometimes, it might be as simple as - I might get in trouble with the teacher sooner or later, so to avoid that I will create trouble now and get pass that stage. 

Unbelievable?

Believe it.